What a Beautiful Mess!

A virtual girl's guide to Second Life fashion!

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The Fear

The Fear

My, my, cold-hearted child, tell me how you feel
Just a blade in the grass, a spoke unto the wheel
Oh, my, my, cold-hearted child, tell me where it’s all gone
All the luster of your bones, those arms that held you strong

Oh, I’ve been worryin’ that my time is a little unclear
I’ve been worryin’ that I’m losing the ones I hold dear
I’ve been worryin’ that we all live our lives in the confines of fear

Oh, my, my, cold-hearted child, tell me how you feel
Just a grain in the morning air, dark shadow on the hill
Oh, my, my, cold-hearted child, tell me where it all falls
All this apathy you feel will make a fool of us all

Oh, I’ve been worryin’ that my time is a little unclear
I’ve been worryin’ that I’m losing the ones I hold dear
I’ve been worryin’ that we all live our lives in the confines of fear

Oh, I will become what I deserve
Oh, I will become what I deserve
Oh, I will become what I deserve
Oh, I will become what I deserve

I’ve been worryin’, I’ve been worryin’,
I will become what I deserve
I’ve been worryin’,
My time is a little unclear
I will become what I deserve

I’ve been worryin’, I’ve been worryin’
That my time is a little unclear
I’ve been worryin’, I’ve been worryin’
That I’m losing the ones I hold dear
I’ve been worryin’, I’ve been worryin’
That we all live our lives in the confines of fear

The Fear‘ ~Ben Howard~

As I stand and look out over the water at Giant’s Causeway at Grauland I can feel the cool ocean breeze, hear the birds as they dip and dive as they fly above me…….I can even hear the waves against the rocks and feel the water splashing on me as it does. All of that should feel like freedom….yet there’s always something keeping me trapped, something that stops me from feeling truly free. I’m trapped inside this mind….and there’s no way to escape, so like with anything that can be stressful I try to stay relaxed, breathe deep and live in the moment….because in the end that’s all we really have.

Holy man, that’s a little dark and depressing today, but it’s just a few thoughts I had when I was taking this picture. Yes, that’s a house arrest anklet………and for some reason it feels good, for some weird reason. I do admit to being a little quirky….so I guess it doesn’t surprise that I’ve taken a liking to being under house arrest. No worries, I still come and go as I please, with no one out looking for me to take me back home. If you want to put yourself under house arrest and spend the days binge watching Netflix and eating popcorn you can get your very own at The Men’s Department. It’s by Duckie and it’s unrigged and resizable so anyone can wear it. TMD runs until January 31.

The ‘Sunny’ bikini is from Blueberry and my breezy hair from tram.

The pose is from the ‘Frankfort’ set from Ana Poses.

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Keep Your Eyes On Me

Keep Your Eyes On Me

Ain’t it just like a tear
To go and blur out everything
Ain’t it just like glass
To fall and break so easily
Ain’t it just like love
To leave a mark on the skin and underneath
Yeah, when the pain goes and shadows everything

Keep your eyes on me
Keep your eyes on me
When it hurts too much to see
Keep your eyes on me

Ain’t it the sinner
Who gets all the grace sometimes
Ain’t it the saint
Who picks up the pieces left behind
Yeah, and it’s human to hurt the one
You hurt the one you love the most
And you can’t find the sun

Keep your eyes on me
When you’re lost in the dark
Keep your eyes on me
When the light in your heart is
Too burned out to see
Keep your eyes on me

You swear you’re all alone sometimes
Keep your eyes on me
And you can’t find your way home sometimes
Keep your eyes on me
Keep your eyes on me

Keep Your Eyes On Me‘ ~Tim McGraw & Faith Hill~

Vrir and I are always sharing ideas and sometimes good things come from them…….this project is going to be a fun one, I think. Awhile ago he asked me if I like the artwork of Renè Gruau……..and with me not completely up on artists, past or present, I had to ask who the heck that was. Well, once I saw some of his work I could say that….yea…..I really like his work……I love the simple bold lines and minimalism. Once we had established we both can appreciate his art Vrir thought it could be fun and inspiring to try to recreate some of his pieces a la Second Life. Since getting the desired effect will take a fair amount of work with PhotoShop…and I have absolutely no skills with it, that part’s all Vrir’s. But that doesn’t mean I can’t take a different view of the scene! Here I am, standing quietly while Vrir photographs. It’s the beginning of the series, ‘A Tribute to Renè Gruau’, you can see the actual recreation on Vrir’s flickr stream. It’s based on an illustration from 1963 for Christian Dior.

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Waitin’ ‘Round To Die

Waiting Around to Die

Sometimes I don’t know where
This dirty road is taking me
Sometimes I don’t even know the reason why
But I guess I keep a-gamblin’
Lots of booze and lots of ramblin’
Well it’s easier than just a-waitin’ around to die

One time, friends, I had a ma
I even had a pa
Well he beat her with a belt once ’cause she cried
She told him to take care of me
Headed down to Tennessee
Well it’s easier than just a-waitin’ around to die

Well I came of age and I found a girl in a Tuscaloosa bar
She cleaned me out and hit in on the sly
I tried to hide the pain, I bought some wine and hopped a train
Well it’s easier than just waitin’ around to die

A friend said he knew
Where some easy money was
We robbed a man, and brother did we fly
The posse caught up with me
And drug me back to Muskogee
Two long years waitin’ around to die

Well, now I’m out of prison
I got me a friend at last
Well he don’t drink or steal or cheat or lie
His name’s codeine
He’s the nicest thing I’ve seen
Yah, together we’re gonna wait around and die
Yah together we’re gonna wait around and die

Waiting ‘Round To Die‘ ~Townes Van Zandt~

This is a picture of my very good friend, Jack Slade….taken at one of his recent shows in the Bunker. I really struggled with picking a song for this picture, mainly because he himself is a songwriter…..and a very good one……and don’t let him tell you different! I couldn’t choose one of his own……..although I have used his songs in the past, that didn’t seem right…..then of all the songs I think suit him best…..well, he covers most of them already….and I didn’t want that. But, when I listened to this song……and read the words, I thought it was as close as I could come to being ‘right’ for Jack. I think he’ll understand why I chose this one. The picture itself was taken while his guitar playing AO was on…..and since I’d forgotten about being able to slo-mo the avatar, getting a half decent shot wasn’t easy……and Miss Lou was the one who told me about that Firestorm feature……I really gotta remember that. If you’re interesting in checking Jack out, you can keep track of what he’s up to on his Facebook page, his show is an enjoyable hour of his heartfelt and soulful original songs and covers. Oh…and if you drop in and see a chair with a reserved sign? Don’t you dare sit in it……that’s mine……and mine alone…..thank you, Miss Lou. Oh……..and don’t let the fact that he has a gun strapped to his back……….it’s just a precaution in these troubled times…….I have to admit that I was a little uncomfortable with it at first……as a Canadian and our aversion to guns, you know. 😛

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Crawling

Crawling

Crawling in my skin
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real

There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming confusing
This lack of self-control I fear is never ending
Controlling I can’t seem

To find myself again
My walls are closing in
(Without a sense of confidence and I’m convinced that there’s just too much pressure to take)
I’ve felt this way before
So insecure

Crawling in my skin
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real

Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me
Distracting reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It’s haunting how I can’t seem

To find myself again
My walls are closing in
(Without a sense of confidence and I’m convinced that there’s just too much pressure to take)
I’ve felt this way before
So insecure

Crawling in my skin
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real

Crawling in my skin
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing confusing what is real

There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface consuming
Confusing what is real
This lack of self-control I fear is never ending controlling
Confusing what is real

Crawling‘ ~Linkin Park~

This song describes my anxiety like no other.

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The Story

The Story

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true, I was made for you

I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby, I broke them all for you
Oh, because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do, and I was made for you

You see the smile that’s on my mouth
It’s hiding the words that don’t come out
And all of my friends who think that I’m blessed
They don’t know my head is a mess
No, they don’t know who I really am
And they don’t know what I’ve been through like you do
And I was made for you

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am
Oh, but these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true, I was made for you

Oh, yeah, well it’s true that I was made for you

The Story‘ ~Brandi Carlile~

This is me as I struggle to write a blog post…..on any given day. I know I don’t always have something to say and when I’m feeling a bit down I usually add nothing to the post other than the song lyrics, I’ve struggled with that for quite awhile. I feel I should have something to say every time, I always have up until lately, but I can’t always be thought provoking or funny….or have a new story, my life’s not been that interesting that I can write about it almost everyday for the 5 years I’ve been blogging. Some days, although few lately, words come easily…….and other days I can’t even think of how to start. I think of a topic that’s current to me at any given moment, but if I write about that every time I think it would bore you to tears after awhile, I know it does me….and it’s my life. lol So, some days I chatter on like an excited teenager and others I’m lost in my own silence…….but I keep on keepin’ on taking pictures……….they’re not all great but I try to have fun doing it.

I’m sitting at the dining room table at home, the old typewriter clickity clacking away……..and for all anyone knows I could just be typing, ‘All work and no play make Liz a dull girl’, and you know all hell is going to break loose when I completely lose it and take an axe to the bathroom door. That’s in reference to the movie, ‘The Shining’, for anyone who doesn’t recognize it. Anyway……I digress, Le Poppycock has released a new pose/prop gacha set for the January round of The Liaison Collaborative and it’s one you’re going to see a lot of from me. It’s called ‘Writer’s Block‘ and I can relate to each and every one of the 14 poses with typewriter, papers, cigarettes and drinks props. This is the ‘Chapter One’ pose and it includes the typewriter and papers prop. The coffee is just something I need to function properly. The Liaison Collaborative runs until January 26.